Meet Taco Meat Tweet Inspired by my brother, who ordered a taco at a local fastfood place only to be told they were out of taco meat. He asked them if they couldn’t just crumble up one of their hamburger patties and put it in a taco shell. They declined.
Bananaesque Tweet Based on an actual bag of “banana chips” purchased at a local health food store. I ate them because, well, I’m a snacker, but they had almost no flavor and weren’t exactly crunchy.
Pet Names Tweet I’m really glad my wife and I never use pet names. For some reason, those always bug me,
Sports Medicine! Tweet I have a niece who is a doctor of sports medicine … or something like that. I think she really enjoys it.
’72 Dolphins Tweet I read a poorly written book about the Dolphins’ undefeated season. Learned a lot, just bugged me about the writing. Anyway, it was while reading that that I thought of this.
Banking Error Tweet Instead of always trying to decide who gets bumped off the money in favor of Harriot Tubman, why not just come up with a new denomination? (For the record, I’m all for replacing Andy Jackson. He was a horrible president.)
Lab Drawing for Life Tweet Someone once asked me to do a lab draw, then they remembered that I’m the chaplain.
I Wanna Go There Tweet “Cars” is my favorite of all the Pixar movies. I know that puts me in the minority, but that’s okay, most people are wrong everyday.
Extraordinary Measures Tweet If you read the release you sign for anything, it’ll make you not want to do it. Also, doesn’t the word “extraordinary” seem like it should mean “extra ordinary” as in “more ordinary than previously thought possible”?