The statistics given in the first two panels are accurate. If “Gunsmoke” were remade today, someone would make sure that Matt killed an equal number of men and women.
I had a coworker who was very dedicated to hospice patients but I came to hate talking to her in the office. Every conversation took twice as long as it needed to because she would finish my sentences–incorrectly.
Actually, I don’t like referring to the famed director as “Jar-Jar Abrams” because I think the character of Jar-Jar was a more positive contribution to the Star Wars franchise than anything Mister Abrams has done (or is likely to do). I wish he would have just stuck with screwing up Star Trek.
As you probably already knew, flamingos are pink because of all the shrimp they consume. I just wondered what would happen if a flamingo ate lots of guacamole. I’m guessing it would die, but would it turn green first?
I’ve heard it pronounced “mee-so” and “mess-o”. The joke really only works with one of them. Of course, some people get mad about a joke that involves cancer in the punchline, even if I’m making fun of Pete’s intelligence and not the disease.
At the medical office where I work, I happened to notice there was some Italian dressing in the fridge that was “best if used by” six years before. I almost felt bad throwing it out, considering it had survived at least three corporate mergers and a buy-out.
