Robot Vacuum Blues Tweet My son’s dog sheds so much that I think it would set one of those robot vacuum’s motors on fire. And she’s a shorthaired dog. Seems like all of her eating must go to hair production.
Eating Skills Tweet The other day I was at a pizza place with my son and he pointed out a lady at a nearby table who was eating her pizza with a knife and fork. I know there’s no moral or civil law against such things, but it sure gets your attention! Okay, mine, anyway.
Rotational Scam Goes Round and Round Tweet When I first got a car, this really confused me. Now that I know what they mean by rotating the tires, I’m not convinced of the efficacy, but I do it anyway.
Body Negativity Tweet I think we all know a person like this. All the opinions and no idea that any of them might be wrong or unpopular.
Hi Bob! Tweet I bet college students today have never heard of “hi bobs”. It’s hard to say that’s a bad thing.
Aunt Ex-Terminator Tweet My sisters have really enjoyed this whole “aunt” thing. I wonder how many people who pronounce it “auhnt” have been perplexed by the whole joke.
Leading the Cheers Tweet I know there are still cheerleaders, but the last few times I’ve been to a game I couldn’t tell if they were saying anything. Does this mean they were doing a good job, if everyone is shouting over them?
No Shame There Tweet I like that he is somehow able to draw his head down below his shoulder level. Do turtles have shoulders?
Going Dutch Tweet Do people still use the phrase “going dutch”? If so, the Dutch don’t seem to be the kind of people to get offended to such things. And where did it come from. Are the Dutch really known for not sharing tickets?
MOTTA Tweet I wish our mayor would run on this slogan. As far as I can tell, our motto is, “When in doubt, put up a traffic cone.”